Saturday, May 15, 2010

woo been awhile!

Well i havnt posted in awhile. school and lazyness lol.
So where ot start? school is over for the semester. I am unable to do summer classes not enough finacnel aid.  did ok in most classes. fouled up my autocad. didnt turn in things. my bad only.

been trying to take care of Karma, his knees are popping out of place or something, might lead to surgery, im suppose to make sure he dosent jump up alot but he does anyway. evil beast.

our other cats are getting along just fine, and so is the puppy. she is beginning to really love her walks outside. when we move i might take her on walks around neighbor hood instead of jus a little one here, which will give us both exercise.

Began a diet recently. not a you can only eat this. basicly im trying to slow my calorie intake. but im not being strict because then ill not want to do it.  basicly i tell my self i can have that chocolate cake if i want it, then ask my self do i really want it. im trying to stay with 1000 calories a day. my body burns 1600 calories on it own a day without me doing anything, so exercise and healthy eating will help burn the fat i got.iv also started limiting myself to two pops a day. they are 120 calories each can. so of my 1000, i use 240 in pop,  alot of people are like why not just stop drinking pop. Because i love it. and to deny my self it cold turkey would totaly kill my diet in a matter of a few hours.  i use to drink at least 4 cans or more a day. so iv dropped down to 2 which is half. and iv been good stuck on it for 7 days down with only one slip up when i had 3, but ill tell you why later.
Been eating tons of healthy stuff and looking at the calories on everthing. didnt know fruit had calories. strawberries ( which i eat lot) are like 1 calorie each. at first i was pissed. i was like HEY , but then i realized i can eat like 100 strawberries and that be like 100 calories, the same as my yogurt. without all the extra fats and such. so then iwasnt as pissed. i know when cherry season comes, ill need to really watch it then cause i can eat like a pound of those a day!!!
Iv been very good on it though. im starting exercise, im try to do one hour worth of exercise every day. then work my way up. because my stamina is not that high, and i cant do standing things for long right now becasue of my right leg, i limit it ot like 10 min or 20 min worth and take a breather.. by the way, 10 mins of basic house cleaning you burn like 49 calories! makes you wanna clean more lol

we also plan to bike ride soon. so much fun.

So we got the van fixed and running and it been awesome being able to leave and not worry about it breaking down. we need to take it on a real road test soon and leave the city and see what happens.

So about that 3rd pop. the other day me and nate were sitting at hte comps just fiddling around, when we heard yelling outside our apartment window. When we looked we saw 5-8 guys out there, in cars with machine guns and pistols (the machine gun is called an ak47 im told) anyway they had bandans on their face and everything. fucking scared the hell out of me!!!
locked out door and was about to call cops when they drove off, our security gaurd came around the corner around then and we  told him what we saw and gave a report to the manger who gave it ot the cops.
but since then i been kinda freaked, because ya never know when someone might get you for that.
Nate was like well then we shouldnt have reported and so on. But that how they win, people are afraid to talk or tell. I will never be afraid to say what i saw. if im raped, im telling who, if im robbed, im telling who. i will not hide in the house and say i saw nothing . No one will be caught if that happens.
i mean im not going walk up to them and be like wooot i reported you. but if i see it im teling a cop.

Well our wii is modded. Which means we can load downloaded Wii Isos to a external hdd and load them up  to check it out. totaly awesome. i even figured out how to make channels. so now we can just load from the wii screen. totaly cool. we got like TONS of games now.

i know how to modd but havnt put it to practice, so we are going to do it to my grandmothers , so we can make surei did it right, and so she can have a few games. then we will help our friends.
i know im a game major and yet here i am modding. well first off i know the reality. alot of people are like how can you make games or books knowing people will just rip them off. Not as many people do this as other think. it seems like alot if you hang around that group but the truth is alot of people dont. A) they dont know how and dont know someone who knows how B) they think it wrong and wont do it  C) it not worth the effort.  so i know for like every 5 people buying my game, 2-3 are stealing it. and ya know that dosent bother me. hell some people steal it and still buy it!

So what are my plans for the summer you might ask? Well we might move, and maybe get another pet, im hopeing to go to lady gaga concert, me and nate might go on a mini vacation for a couple days. plan to exercise and do outside things.
work on a game and maybe even try wrting a book.
work on crafts, maybe leanr to sew, try to keep up with a penpal.
i dont know i want to do alot!!! lol

so i dont have a following on here yet. part of it bcause i totaly havnt written anything awhile lol. But im not out to get a following, it nice to put everything out and go over what iv done and been doing it makes it not so built up in me

like the convo me and nate had. not going to give details basicly it turns out we were both kinda miserable for a few months and both thinking of leaving or cheating on the other do to differnt reasons, both of never told the other at the time, and never discuessed it, and neither of us cheated, or left. both decied  it wasnt worth it to cheat, and i dont know what else. but later we were both kinda happy with each other and it was getting way better, then we had a dicussion about how unhappy he been and i been and he didnt know i was unhappy, i kinda knew he was. and we both realized we accutly like being with each other and each had purposly (him more then me) pushing the other away or doing things we knew would annoy the other, and after seein each other put up with it (me more then him) we realized we rather deal with each other then anyone elses bullshit, and we tolerate things from each other we wouldnt from others. LOL he called me a fungus, that at first he was ok if i left, but iv grown on him and he would prefer me to stay then leave.
we dont know if its going to last forever or anything, but neither of us see us leaving in the near future and both of us are glad about that.

i dont know it was nice othave the talk he said things that hurt my feelings, but im glad he told me. and i know he wasnt saying it ot hurt me, he was saying it so i would know. hell if he wanted ot hurt me he would have said those things orginaly! and i know sme of the things i said might have botherd him but he also knew i wasnt just saying ot say it or get back it was how i felt. either way we been way happier and EXTREMLY less agumentive  in the past month or so then we have in a long long time. it been awesome. i personaly been trying to make sure i dont be overly bitchy and such and i know he been making an effort to not ignore me. it was very nice.

we had other drama, but for once not between us but between others. but solved it and moved on , no point dwelling on it.

Mothers day was killer for me...i hate that day, the reminder that my mom isnt around is horrible. i still cant look at her pictures or videos, it so sad it hard ot thnk about her. i get upset and cry everytime and it been almost 3 years ....still.. i so sad.i just.. get so emotional. movies where the mom dies, make me sadder then normal. or people who die of cancer.. hell bring up cancer either pisses me off or makes me sad because all i can think of is how they ocouldnt save her.
but im hoping.. by sept....the month sshe died, that ill have pictures of her in frames... i plan to use photo shop on some and make them look really nice since we dont have any real nice protraits of mom in her later years.
which ...makes me sad because we were planning ot et a family one done of us kids and her...and...she died...argh see it happening again.. anyway

so that my plan. im also looking to build her something.. i want to build her a small cabinet thing... that will hang on the wall.. her urn will sit in side, there wil be a picture of her in it, and on the doors when they open will be a spot for incense to burn for her on ceritan days and such. i want ot stain it a pretty color like a nice maghonay and polish it up, and use a wood burning kit to carve a nice design on it. set it on a wall somewhere.
i think that a nice idea and i bet i can do it.

so wow this has been one heck of a entry huh. well let me know what yall think.
sandy bunny

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